i stand corrected

i have been put in my place. but not in a mean or demeaning way. simply by the encouragement and faith of a friend. i wasn't too happy last night when i wrote on my blog. there were, uh, certain extenuating circumstances though: it was my first of 3 night shifts, which is always the hardest b/c i am up for over 24 hours and answering 6 other ppl's needs and desires. cindy left a comment with a bible verse that was the complete opposite of my post last night. while the verse is encouragement on a good night like tonight (i slept 6 hours today, i feel better) it is definitely hard to live it day to day. so here's the verse: Col 1:9-12 i ask that you may be filled with the knowldge of his will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so that yoyu may walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing the knowldge of god. may you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might for all endurance and patience with joy, giving tahnks to the father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light. " so yeah, that was not so much me last night. 'fully pleasing...bearing fruit in every good work.." i have so much opportnity for that here at work. so many timesi come in contact with ppl and have the chance to be full yp leasing not only to god but for god int he form of my patient. jesus had a thankless job. i can understand that part of his life. but he overcame where i cannot: he gave thanks for his thankless job. good thing i'm not jesus. thanks cindy, for passing along the verse. you have, as always, had a very great and positive influence on part of my life.

on other things: i am deciding that i have a knack for not knowing or picking up on the subtle politics of jobs. i was just in the break room, where particularly on night shift, the juiciest gossip comes out about co-workers. however, it is always, always news to me. i never seem to pick up on the subtle hatred many ppl share for our manager, or how so-n-so looked at so-n-so, or what somebody said to someone... i think that perhaps i see them happen, notice things, but don't put two and two together in my head to mean something. actually, ia m kind of happy about thsi knack. i would rather float through my work place minding my own business and not knowing what other ppl thinkof my manger. as long as i know what i think -that's what is really importnat. actually, my curent manager is leaving. her last day is monday. i have no beefs with her. she's always been nice to me. but then, i also have not been through a review with her yet to recieve a raise. maybe that's when ppl start not liking their authorities. however, every authority is placed by God and is therefore worthy of our respect. we don't have to like them. just respect them. my theory is like this: everyone loves me today, but tomorrow if i become your manger you will find a million reasons to sincerely dislike me. it doens't matter how cool you are as a co worker. beocme managment and suddenly everone is against you. i dno't know if i ever want to be a manger in anything. it seems really hard b/c you can't please everyone and your budget too. i don't envy my manger her job. i just wonder who will be my next manager and what they will be like. i also wonder what my raise willb e like. geez, i've never had a raise. it'll be kinda cool. but you knwo what? i thought that professional ppl int eh "real world" got raises in the forms of DOLLARS. nope, it is isn the form of CENTS. pennies actually. if i am good, and do everyting i was usposed to do (which i have no way of knowing since we only get reviewed once a year and noboby has told me if i doint things right yet or not...) i might get a raise of 50 cents. CENTS. wow, that does not definitely keep up with inflation. welcome to the real world yet again Polly.

9 days and counting until my birthday. may 14th. isn't it funny how the day you were born will always sound special to you? i mean, it could have been october 14th, but nothing sounds special about october 14th to me. but the syllables of may 14th-ahhh, now that brings back childhood memories of cupcakes for the home room, slipnslide bday parties, big cakes, lots of barbie doll birthday presents, and getting to leave school to go have lunch with my mom at my favorite mexican restaurant in harrison arkansas (which was miquel's by the way. i don't know if it is stil going or not..)ahhh, the lovely sound of may 14th. alas, it has lost some of its luster in latter days. now it is kinda awkard. like, i wish i could have a slip n slide party, but i am too old for that. or i don't have a yard with a slip n slide to even have one. or, what do you do about your new friends who don't know your bday? do you tell them? or do you just sweetly pretend like the words "may 14th" don't have a nastalgic, magic ring to your ear? may 14th also marks the beginning of my family's canyonlands backpacking trip. miranda and darin are arriving the friday before, i work all day saturday and then sunday, "MAY 14TH", we drive down past moab to the free BLM camping in indian creek (my crack climbing mecca-see pics). we are also backpacking with my newphew of a grand 18 months. let me tell you, i will have some good baby stories when i get back. just imagine...backpacking with a baby. now imagine packing dirty diapers out 25 miles...ummmmm.. looking forward to that one. but ti's better to have us all together than leave someone watching adrian at home. i am super excited to be with my family again. plus, it's nothing boring either. we are backpakcing. i love my family. so i've been trying to guess what eric got me for my bday. i found one present accidentally already. he got a new laptop and was showing me how cool it was that the CD covers of the songs he purchases from itunes shows up as a desktop. well, i saw the jewel cover from the new movie pride and prejudice (which was fantastic- even eric really liked it!) and i said, 'you got a song from that movie??!!' and eric turned red. he bought me the theme song for my bday. isn't that sweet?! i love it. it's a beautiful song. so here's my guess as to what he got me for my bday: an ipod nano. at least that is what i am secretly hopeing. however it is no long secret b/c eric reads this blog too. don't say anythign eric- just let me pretend that you don't know what i am guessing about. i wno't be disappointed if it's not that. i can still always borrow your's! :) besides, you give wonderful presents. am i allowed to be talking to eric on my blog? since i live with the guy it doens't make much sense. but then, he is leaving for a week and i wno't have him around... :) i'll stop talking to eric now and address only my blog.

this is quickly becoming another bohemoth. i suppose i'll stop it now. see, the thing is, i have developed this amazing skill at fast typing. as you can see, i make several mistakes. but for the most part i do alright. it came from AOL in high school. that was so cool back then, and it's what you did from the time you got home from school till you went to bed. you chatted it up. an itw as fun. so you have to get fast to keep up a converstaion on that thing. otherweise there are these long awkward pauses and you get impatient to know what the ppl are thinking. so ig ot really fast at typing, even if somewhat inaccurate. i can get the piont across. so even though my blgos are really long, it doesn't take me that long to actually type them out. enjoy!! sorry for the typo-s. i know that can be horrible to try and read. i can understand it perfectly enough but i suppose other ppl can't. i used to write eric long letters from idaho when i lived there for a summer. my writing would get really fast too and he wouln't be able to decipher what in the world i wrote. i could figure it out sometimes though b/c it was my own thought and i could finish it without having the letter in front of me. but eric used to make bad words too and he couldn't figure out what in the world he had been talking about. we are all guilty. i am jsut more guilty of fast typing and bad typos. i'd rather be fast though.